Help! My Friend Is Taking Advantage of Me
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By Suzy Moore/Posted: Dec 10 2014
Help! My Friend Is Taking Advantage of Me

Sometimes money is a huge divider of friendships. When you make or have more money than your friends, it’s easy to find yourself in the position of spending way too much money on them. These tips will help you deal with the toxic friends that are draining the life out of you, along with your savings.

Learn How to Say No

If your friend is always asking you to buy them things when you’re out, simply tell them "No." When you’re constantly giving in and paying their way through life, they’ll see you as a pushover. Being generous is a good quality, but coming out and asking for things is disrespectful.

Never let anyone make you feel like you would buy them something if you were a good friend. A good friend wouldn’t ask you to spend money on them.

Tell Them to Bring Cash

Some friends always want to go to the movies or out for lunch, but often leave their purse or wallet at home. Make a point of telling them to bring money with them, when you’re making plans. It makes it clear that you only intend to pay for yourself, and they are responsible for their own good time.

It’s not that you’re being cheap or mean. It’s that you’re being responsible. You probably work hard for your money, and if someone is taking advantage of you, you need to make it stop now. If telling your friend to bring some cash along to cover their own expenses is the only way to get through to them, do it.

Make Reciprocating a Habit

When your friend has money, try to incorporate a spirit of reciprocation into your friendship. If they ask you to buy lunch today, when they want to go out on Friday remind them that it’s their turn to pay.

By taking turns covering each other’s expenses you can save the friendship and avoid the great money divide that tears many friendships apart.

Ditch Your Toxic Friends

If your friend just won’t stop asking for money or trying to get you to buy them things, it might be time to end the friendship. Real friends don’t take advantage of you or expect anything from you, but your time.

If you have a friend that only calls when they need something, or who only hangs around with you to get you to buy them things, it’s time to kick them to the curb. They’ll drain the life out of you, and your bank account, if you let them.

So Are You Saying Being Generous Is a Bad Thing?

No, absolutely not. Just keep in mind that if you hand over too much money, you won’t have money for the things you need. Always ask yourself if this particular friend would be as generous with you, if the shoe were on the other foot. You’ll be surprised at how often the answer is no.

What if You Are the Toxic Friend?

Wait, what if the toxic friend we’re talking about is you? If you recognize that you might have taken advantage of a friend, you can still turn it around and fix it. Recognizing your behavior is the first step.

Make a point of paying your own way from now on when you go out with your friend, so you don’t wind up being the leech everyone steers clear of, if you aren’t already. Taking your friend out for lunch as a show of good measure will be a nice surprise and just might turn the tables on your friendship for the better.

Do you have a friend who is constantly taking advantage of you? Tell us about it.

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Comments (7)
Powerchic  - My friend seems weird. She always hides things from me and I never know what she is up to anymore. And it seems like she doesn't want me to be with a certain guy that I like. - Feb 19 2021 - Like
Strang-er  - My problem is a little different :/. I live in a hostel and my friend lives in an apartment. once every month we go back and meet our parents in our hometown. The thing is he is from a rich family and im from a mediocre one. He pays for the travel expenses and the food on our way. I always try to offer money or buy food but he doesnt let me. I tried talking to him about it but he just minds it and tells me to shut up and keep the formalities away. Its in my nature to never leach off of others and this is killing me from inside so I feel really bad. What can I do :/ - Aug 27 2016 - Like
auntjemima98  - if ur friend is taking advantage of u. defriend them - Jan 16 2015 - Like
helldroppr  - Be selfish, don't be greedy. Care for yourself then care for others. Also, get rid of the friends who parasite off of you. Not hard. I know there are some emotionally simple people here, but it's a no and a leave. - Dec 15 2014 - Like
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